I’ve been reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan.  And it’s been CHALLENGING.  It talks about how we as Christians should live if we are truly truly in love with God.  And I’ve realized, to my dismay, I haven’t been living like someone who claims to be overwhelmed by God.  I’ve been selfish, consumed with the world, and I haven’t taken my bible literally when it comes to the hard stuff – like loving your enemies, giving more than you can handle, etc.


I’ve thought to myself, I’m good enough.  I’m a decent Christian.  Surely God can’t expect more from me.  Why can’t this be enough – the parts of me that I’m willing to give.  Why should I surrender everything??

“Do not assume you are good soil…when we want God and a bunch of other stuff, then that means we have thorns in our soil.  A relationship with God simply cannot grow when money, sins, activities, favorite sports teams, addictions, or commitments are piled on top of it.”

“Are you willing to say to God that He can have whatever He wants?  Do you believe that wholehearted commitment to Him is more important than any other thing or person in your life?  Do you know that nothing you do in this life will ever matter, unless it is about loving God and loving the people He has made?”


I’ve been lukewarm.  I haven’t jumped in.  Standing on the sidelines, I’ve been playing it safe because I’ve grown addicted to my own comfort.

“Lukewarm people are continually concerned with playing it safe; they are slaves to the god of control.  This focus on safe living keeps them from sacrificing and risking for God.”

“God doesn’t call us to be comfortable.  He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn’t come through.”

“We are consumed by safety…I’m not saying it is wrong to pray for God’s protection, but I am questioning how we’ve made safety our highest priority.  We’ve elevated safety to the neglect of whatever God’s best is, whatever would bring God the most glory, or whatever would accomplish His purposes in our lives and in the world.”


I haven’t wanted to be radical.  To be that crazy Christian girl…but loving Jesus means that “crazy” should be normal.  What other people consider “normal” should be my definition of crazy.

“Having faith often means doing what others see as crazy.  Something is wrong when our lives make sense to unbelievers.”

“The concept of downsizing so that others might upgrade is biblical, beautiful…and nearly unheard of…dare to imagine what it would mean for you to take the words of Jesus seriously.”

“It is just this sort of love that is crazy to the world: true love, a kind found nowhere but through Christ.  We are commanded to love our enemies and do good to them.”


I’ve been generous yes, but I’ve also been afraid.  Afraid that God won’t provide.  Refusing to spend money because I can’t see the provision coming.  Saying I’m not in a position to bless others…

“If you really want to experience God’s supernatural provision, then do as He says.  Test Him.  Give more than you can manage, and see how He responds.”

“For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil.  Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs…people who are obsessed with Jesus live lives that connect them with the poor in some way or another.”

Recently I received a massive financial miracle.  God used a friend to bless me with a 5 digit sum…I’ve never had anything like that happen to me.  I was so overwhelmed I sat and cried in my room.  First of all, I was overwhelmed by God’s love and provision.  And second, I was overwhelmed by the goodness of my friend, who heard God speak to him and immediately acted on it.  I am challenged today to be more like that.  God blessed me through this friend financially but He also expects me to learn from this.  Not to take this gift and have it stop with me.  I am called to do those kinds of “radical” “crazy” things.  They are not reserved for other Christians, for people who are more well off.  I’m meant to do these things.  I’m meant to be that crazy Christian girl who loves the people that hurt her and gives freely knowing that God will provide.  Who downsizes so she can bless others.

In time I want to surprise myself with my life.  A life that is sold out to God.  Overwhelmed by His love.  And shares that experience with others.  In time, daily, I want to be more like Christ.

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